Unusual October
by kissmyquiver
Summary: a bunch of prompts i did for unusual october. crack. rated t for swears
1. day 1

**alright y'all. im reposting all of my tumblr-written fics here so that more people can enjoy my bullshit. come find me mlb-shit-post.**

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day 1: "outlandish outfits"

Crashing a wedding wasn't exactly on Marinette's to-do list. Of course, dressing up like a freak overtop of her Ladybug suit wasn't on the itinerary either.

"Come on, LB!" Chat had said. "It will be so much fun!"

She continued to be hesitant and resist, but before she could say no, Chat grabbed her hand and whisked her across the street to a costume shop that was for some reason, still open at 2100.

The owners were so grateful, they let them have whatever they wanted. Chat threw a boa around Ladybug, and slipped a fedora on his own head. He found a massive 50's poodle skirt and threw it around his waist, handing Ladybug a trench coat. He handed her a pair of stripper-like stilettos, and put on a superhero cape. They looked like a mess, but the duo was having a good time.

They thanked the owners of the shop and left quickly. They had a wedding to crash.


	2. day 2

day 2: "strange sleeping"

"Alright guys! That's a wrap!" One of the producers began to clap, followed by the rest of the production team. It was a miracle. Zag's team had managed to do something that hadn't been done in a very long time. In fact, all of the odds were against them. They had no faith from the fans, the characters, and even most of the producers themselves. However, the team had managed to accomplish the unthinkable; they had released an episode on time. No rescheduling, no delaying, no "vice previous word." This was bonafide, real, on-time television.

The room filled with cheers, the excitement couldn't be contained. Confetti fell from the ceiling, fiesta music blasted through the speakers, and everyone cheered and hugged each other.

Adrien jumped awake, sitting up in a cold sweat. His head was pounding. _What was that dream even about?_ He thought to himself. _So weird. Something like that would obviously never happen._ Adrien rolled back over and tried not to think about it. He had a long day ahead of him and needed all the sleep he could get.


	3. day 3

day 3: "too much coffee"

Mari was dying. Not actually, but she felt like she was. When she had woken up this morning, she felt like she had been hit by a bus. She was in a horrible mood, the akuma had struck just as she was getting into school, and believe it or not Chat's incessant puns were not helping her headache go away.

The ringing in her ears got louder. She put her hands over her ears and sat down slowly. In the middle of the street. During an akuma attack.

Chat yelled from across the street. He was getting tossed around by the massive octopus that was making its way through Paris. It held a couple cars, a tree, a signed photo of Claude François, and Chat Noir. "My Lady," he shouted. "It's not really the time to meditate! Your center of focus should be on getting rid of this akuma!"

Ladybug grimaced. "Not now, chaton!" The sound of her own voice hurt to hear.

Chat frowned. Even in the arms of an octopus he knew his Lady would never act like this. Struggling, he reached for his baton and managed to push the button that expanded it. It poked through the octopus's arm and the creature dropped him without hesitation. He hit the ground running and sprinted towards Ladybug.

"What are you doing?" He grabbed her by the collar and pushed her into a back ally. The creature trampled past them and kept going. They could afford a little break at this point.

Mari rolled over on the ground, and Chat set her up against a wall. He looked at her, trying to figure out what was wrong.

"Stop talking," Ladybug mumbled.

That caught Chat's attention. "I didn't say anything Buggaboo. Now tell me, how are you feeling?"

She groaned and tried to lie back down. Chat grabbed her by the shoulders and held her in place. "Oh no you don't."

"I feel like absolute shit. I didn't sleep a wink last night, I have this massive headache, and I think I keep hearing things."

Chat pulled out his cell phone and started typing her syndromes into his search bar. He felt her pulse; her heart was going a mile a minute. Way too elevated, especially since she had been sitting at rest for several minutes.

"Well did you eat anything different for dinner last night?" He asked, trying to gauge whether or not she felt bad because of what she had eaten.

"I didn't eat dinner."

His ears perked up. "Did you eat anything all day?"

Ladybug shook her head slowly. "I drank one hundred cups of coffee."

Chat gasped. "My Lady, you cannot be drinking that much coffee."

"I know I just needed to stay awake for some homework I had to get done."

"Okay that's bullshit. You're addicted. We need to get you off of this."

Mari nodded painfully. How did you stop coffee addiction anyways?

"Just stay here and let me take care of this akuma. When I capture the butterfly I'll come back for you to purify it. But after that we are having a serious talk about this problem!"

Ladybug was so confused. Why was Chat Noir acting like a dad. He used a dad voice and a dad concern, but he didn't have a dad bod so she was pretty confused.

About fifteen minutes to three days later (Mari wasn't exactly sure), Chat returned. He handed her a bottle of water. "Chug this. You're dehydrated."

Mari did as he said while he began to lecture her. "Too much coffee is bad," he said. "It'll increase your risk of osteoporosis and damage your liver." Blah, blah, blah, Mari didn't really care. What she cared about was the next time she'd get her hands on a cup.


	4. day 4

day 4: "ladybug but different"

Chat Noir sighed, looking at his watch. He didn't want to say that he hated working with Ladybug, but he would say that it was downright inconvenient. All of her different…parts were never where they should be, and as a result she was never on time.

As Plagg informed him, Ladybug was usually a person. But this time around, for ungodly some reason, Ladybug was an assimilation of wonder pets. It wasn't, like, five wonder pets. It was literally 45 of them, all varying in their locations around the city. They would all try and sneak away from their families in the middle of the night for patrol and then stick together like a massive transformer robot, working together to fight crime.

Chat had a lot of respect for them. He had no clue what kind of coordination it took for them to mush together and take on the form of a crime fighting human. They did a really good job.

He sighed and looked down at his feet. One of the small ducks looked up at him. He was usually one of the first to arrive.

"Yeah, you might want to sit down," the duck told him. "It's going to be a long wait."

Chat obeyed, putting his face in his hands. Like he said, Ladybug was inconvenient.


	5. day 5

day 5: "friends in very unexpected places"

This akuma was large. Not the 'oh that's a pretty big dude' large. More like, the 'wow that building touches the clouds, I wonder how high it is' large. At first, Marinette wasn't that concerned about it. Big equals slow, and slow equals ease of maneuverability.

However, this big was big and fast.

"Chat! Over he-" Ladybug was cut off, and thrown through the windows of Collège Françoise Dupont. She landed with a thud, her body skidding across the floor and into a wall containing exclusively urinals.

"Oh hey, Ladybug." Nino has just finished zipping his pants back up when he turned and faced her.

Mari blinked. This was the last place she expected to be. She was half through a wall and half in a urinal. Water was pooling on the floor and yet Nino stood in front of her, as cool as a cucumber.

"Hey Nino," she groaned, raising herself out of the wall.

"How has your day been?" he asked.

Ladybug served up a look. How did he manage to be so oblivious of the massive akuma outside? "I'm not the greatest right now. Chat and I are getting out asses kicked out there."

Nino nodded in understanding.

Ladybug looked at him expectantly. "Now would be a good time to, you know, suit up."

Nino turned and faced the window she had just came through. "Huh." He peered out of it, his hand over his head protecting his eyes from the bright mid-day sun.

Ladybug joined him at the window. "Whenever you feel like it, Nino." She jumped out, propelling down the street using her yo-yo.

"Oh. Right! Wayzz! Shell On!"

With a flash of bright green light, Nino transformed into Carapace and followed Ladybug out of the window.


	6. day 6

day 6: "baking gone wrong"

"MMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmm," Adrien moaned, half of the macaroon hanging out of his mouth. "My Lady, this is definitely the most amazing thing I have ever eaten in my life."

Ladybug rolled her eyes. "Come on Chat," she teased. "My macaroons are okay, but my dad's are the best in all of Paris!"

He blinked. "So you're telling me, that an item that tastes even better than this is out there?" He shook his head. "Nope. False. Untrue. I don't believe it." Ladybug laughed, and the sound was music to Adrien's ears. He smiled widely. "But if there was, my Lady, where would I go to find it?"

She reached over to smack him lightly on the head. Their feet dangled over the side of the building, over looking the rest of Paris. They both had places to be soon so the pair had elected to stay away from the Eiffel Tower.

Adrien ducked and flashed her a smile. "If someone has managed to make a better macaroon than you, I need to try it."

"Nice try, Kitty."

He shrugged, leaning back on his hands. "It was worth a shot."

Ladybug sighed, looking over at her partner. "How about this, I'll write down my recipe and give it to you so you can make it at home."

Chat's eyes lit up. He gave her a big bear hug. "LB that would be the best present ever!"

She laughed, pushing him off her slightly. She scribbled the recipe down on a napkin she brought with her and handed it to the greedy cat.

Adrien held it in his hands like it was the most precious thing in the world. So much was happening all at once. He was finally getting to see Ladybug's handwriting, but it was oddly familiar. He would also get to make the macaroons whenever he wanted, which was awesome. He'd have to get his chef to help him.

The wheels in Adrien's brain started spinning rapidly. He had some free time tomorrow where he could stop by the kitchen and ask his personal chef to whip some macaroons up, and maybe take the time to teach him so he could do it himself. If the week went well, it was gonna be the best one he had in a while.

Later in the week, Adrien made a trek down to his kitchen. His chef, Pierre, was present and preparing lunch.

"Hey Pierre!"

"Monsieur Adrien, what can I do for you today?"

"Pierre I was wondering if you would be willing to teach me how to make macaroons."

"Monsieur Adrien, I am not allowed to make sweets. You know what Monsieur Agreste thinks of them."

Adrien's mood dropped. "You're right," he said sullenly. He blinked, an idea hitting him. "Chef, what if I had some friends over and we were allowed to use your kitchen?"

Chef Pierre winked back at Adrien. "I don't care what happens here after hours, as long as you keep my kitchen clean."

Adrien gave the cook a hug. "Thank you so much Pierre!"

He left the kitchen and returned to his room. He texted the only friend he had that knew how to cook: Marinette.

hey mari! a friend gave me a really good macaroon recipe and I need help making it. wanna come over and test it out?

Mari nearly fell off of her bed, and agreed to come over later that night after dinner to get started.

The doorbell rang and Adrien rushed to answer it. He ripped it open. "Marinette!"

"Hi Adrien!" She waved shyly and he pulled her inside.

"Quickly," he told her. "My dad doesn't know this is happening so we have to keep it on the down low."

Mari nodded. She knew his father could be overprotective and overbearing, so the least she could do was help prevent Adrien from being caught.

"This is the kitchen," Adrien led Mari inside. She was taken aback by how large it was.

"So let's see this recipe," she began.

Adrien pulled out the napkin from his back pocket and placed it on the countertop in front of them. Mari sucked in a breath and held it, her face turning ghostly white. It was the same note she had given Chat Noir last patrol.

She pushed the air in her lungs out, suddenly very nervous. If Adrien had gotten a hold of the recipe copy she had given Chat, it could only mean that either Adrien was good friends with her obnoxious kitty, or he was her obnoxious kitty.

"Um…Adrien," she began. He looked at her and nodded to continue. "Where did you get this recipe?"

"I got it from the love of my life," he sighed, thinking about Ladybug.

Mari frowned. Was Adrien gay? And dating Chat Noir? She'd support him either way, but a small part of her didn't want to believe it.

"Adrien," she began, "Are you in love with Chat Noir?"

He barely held in a laugh. "Hardly. I'm in love with Ladybug."

Mari slowly put the pieces together. If Ladybug gave him the recipe, then he was Chat Noir.

She felt sick. The guy she had been rejecting had actually been the guy she was in love with all along. Fuck.

"Adrien, I think we need to talk."

He had been rummaging through the kitchen trying to find all of the supplies they would need for the recipe. He stopped and joined her back at the counter, a couple pots and pans smashing in the background.

"You got this recipe from Ladybug?" she asked.

He smiled. "I don't kiss and tell, Mari."

She rolled her eyes. "That's not what I'm saying. I'm just wondering, are you Chat Noir?"

Marinette didn't mean to be so direct, but the question kind of spilled out. Adrien nearly slipped off the counter, face bright red. "No absolutely not why would you think such a thing."

She looked at him and smiled. "Because I gave this recipe to Chat Noir last night."

He blinked three times, piecing the picture together. "Holy shit. My Lady?"

It was her turn to wink at him. "In the flesh, mon Chaton."


	7. day 7

day 7: "evil vegetarians"

Ladybug swooped down on top of the akuma. It was a massive cow, wagging its tail and refusing to stop its slow motion rampage through the streets of Paris. Every stop caused the ground to shake, but every so often the cow would stop moving and begin to chew on a tree. The cow's stupidity made it impossible to control, causing car alarms to go off every couple seconds of rampage.

She needed it under control. Where was Chat Noir? Her partner in crime was never normally this late. She threw her yo-yo out and around the cow's head like reigns in attempt to control the cow's movements.

"Look out, because you're about to become ground beef!" Ladybug rolled her eyes, but was very thankful that Chat had finally arrived.

Everything seemed to be going as planned until a voice sounded loud above all the other noises.

"NOT SO FAST!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing, including the cow.

"WE WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS." A small white girl stood before another group of people. "WE WILL NOT WATCH IDLY AS YOU TORTURE THIS CREATURE."

Chat landed beside her. "Fuck," he breathed out, "it's Peeta."

Ladybug's eyes widened. "Are you even shitting me?" she asked, although she knew he wasn't.

"LADYBUG WE CANNOT LET ONE OF OUR BELOVED HEROES ATTACK THIS INNOCENT COW. WE CANNOT STAND FOR THIS CRUEL ABUSE!" The small crowed behind her roared, their signs moving up and down angrily.

Ladybug stood up. "You guys do know this isn't a cow, right?"

The Peeta supporter pointed up to the two heroes on top of the massive cow. "LOOK AT THEM NOW! BLATANTLY DEHUMANIZING THE COW, TELLING IT THAT IT ISN'T EVEN A COW!" The crowd got angrier and angrier.

"No, I'm serious! This is an akuma! It's a person! Who is possessed by Hawkmoth! Chat Noir and I have to stop it and help the person inside of this cow come back out!" Ladybug did her best to explain the situation, but it didn't seem to be working out.

"ALRIGHT LADYBUG! IF YOUR INTENTION IS TO HELP THIS ANIMAL, WHY IS YOUR YO-YO AROUND ITS NECK?"

The crowd gasped, and the cow started to move.

"Fuck this," she mumbled as she tightened her yo-yo around the akuma's neck. "Chat, we don't have time for this shit. Executive decision, I say we just take care of this akuma and then deal with the vegans later."

"Sounds puuurrrr-fect to me, my Lady."

After fifteen minutes of diligent work, Ladybug and Chat Noir purified the akuma. When the duo landed together in front of the media, a slim woman with a briefcase approached the heroes quickly. "You've been served," she told them, pushing a manila envelope into their arms and leaving them dumbfounded.

Long story short, it was the quickest dismissed case in all of France's history.


	8. day 8

day 8: "bizarre lucky charms"

"Lucky Charm!" Ladybug threw her yo-yo into the air, summoning the special item that she and Chat would soon use to defeat the akuma. A box of lucky charms landed in her arms.

Chat stood up straight, looking perplexed.

"Oh, thank God." Ladybug tore open the box, and began to scarf the delicious breakfast cereal down.

"Wait are you sure that's what you're supposed to do with it?"

She turned to him, her mouth filled with marshmallows and cereal pieces. "Um…yeah!" She swallowed. "I didn't eat any breakfast this morning and I'm running on fumes. Now I'm filled with nutrients and ready to kick some ass!"

Chat stared at her quizzically. "All right I guess. Whatever works, my Lady."

She smiled. "Let go, Kitty! Let's kick this akuma's ass!"


	9. day 9

day 9: "musical mayhem"

A crash resounded. Everyone in the audience gasped, and the orchestra came to a screeching halt. Ladybug and Chat Noir landed on the stage, crouched and at the ready. The akuma burst through the backdrop, sending pieces of the set flying into the audience.

"Chat!" Ladybug shouted. "You go low! I'll go high!" The akuma stomped on be ground, shaking the stage. He nodded, leaping into the orchestra.

It was still dark, which wasn't a problem for him, but would be a problem for everyone trying to evacuate. He blinked, ushering some people out of the pit.

Suddenly, Adrien found himself behind a piano. He looked up at Ladybug, gracefully apprehending the akuma. It was slowing down, its head caught between two massive props, and Ladybug was getting closer and closer to cleansing it. He stretched out his fingers over the keys, and began to bang out the greatest concerto ever to be played within the concert hall.

The sound rang through the building. Chat kept his eyes up, narrating the fight between his Lady and the monster above. He used the lower octaves for the akuma, and the higher, sweeter pitches for Ladybug. He kept a careful eye on them; if Ladybug needed help, he didn't want to be too far removed from the fight.

Suddenly, the akuma was captured and purified. The second the white butterfly disappeared, Chat played his final note. The auditorium went quiet, and then erupted in cheers. He moved onto the stage to join Ladybug, grabbing her hand and thrusting it into the air like a referee would a boxer. He held it up and then together bowed them both over.

She turned toward him, perplexion written all over her face. "You play piano?" she asked.

He winked at her. "There's a lot you don't know about this alley cat, My Lady."

Her earrings began to buzz, so she laughed and said goodbye, zipping through the streets of Paris wondering what other secrets her kitty had hidden up his sleeves.


	10. day 10

day 10: "very high stakes board game"

"Alya," Marinette warned softly, "I'm not sure this is a good idea."

"Come on, what can go wrong?" she asked, dumping the box onto the floor. The sheen of the game flared up at Marinette, making her uncomfortable. Nino averted his gaze too, trying not to make direct eye contact with the board.

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Maybe she's right Alya. This is like the start of every horror film in existence." He glanced down at the box. The ouija board itself didn't really scare Adrien, but the idea of it did. If the spirits inside were really real, then what did they want? How would they treat them? How much did they know about him being Chat Noir? Adrien was thinking ahead, more petrified of the 'what if' then of the board itself.

"Guys, there's nothing to be afraid of! I've done this hundreds of times with my little siblings! Besides, it's not like we have any bad spirits after us or anything! We're just having fun."

"Alright," Nino finally spook up. "Just for a little bit. But as soon as this stuff starts getting creepy or serious we're shutting it down."

Alya rolled her eyes. "You guys are boring, but fine. We'll have to make do."

Adrien glanced up. He could see Marinette sitting in front of him, very uncomfortable. Marinette was one of the strongest people he knew. Seeing her like this didn't do a whole lot for his confidence, but he trusted his friends even if they did have whacky ideas.

"Alright, now everyone put your hands on the piece in the middle," Alya directed. The four did as they were told. "We'll start with a little warm up."

She paused, mainly for dramatic affect. "Is there a spirit among us today?" She asked. Marinette drew in a sharp breath. The piece in the middle started to move towards "yes."

Alya gasped.

"What is it?" Marinette asked.

"I just never got this far before!" The group collectively drew in a shaky breath, looking at each other for guidance.

"So what happens next?" Nino asked. "Please don't let it be some freaky-ass bullshit. My body can't handle much more of your crazy today."

Alya rolled her eyes. "Well, Nino, now we ask the spirit questions! What do you guys want to know?"

Mari pursed her lips. She was thinking about what Alya might want to know most, and not liking the idea of her asking a spirit about Ladybug's identity.

Adrien did the same, thinking of how awesome it would be to find out Ladybug's identity. He could finally find her in real life and woo her like a proper gentleman.

Alya sighed. "You guys are so lame! I'll go first then. What are the identities of Ladybug and Chat Noir?"

Marinette and Adrien sprung into action, Mari pretended to lose her balance, pushing her hands further into the board. Adrien did the same, effectively landing on top of Marinette, who was on top of the board. Adrien had not been expecting such a reaction from Marinette, but he wasn't expecting Alya to want to know _his_ identity either.

"What the fuck are you guys doing?"

Mari sat up quickly, pushing Adrien off of her and retreating to her side of the room. "N-nothing," she stammered. "Absolutely nothing."

Adrien pushed himself off the ground. "Yeah Alya, I just think Mari and I aren't really that comfortable playing with this thing."

Nino nodded aggressively. "I agree this is some shady shit."

Alya rolled her eyes. "Alright, alright. We'll find something else to do then instead."

Both Mari and Adrien shared a sigh of relief.


	11. day 11

p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"day 11: "weird kwami meals"/p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"Plagg was acting weirder than usual. He didn't seem to be hiding anything from Adrien, or at least, trying to hide anything from Adrien, but it didn't make his behavior any less weird. In fact, Adrien knew exactly what Plagg's intentions were: and it scared him./p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"It began one day when Adrien came home from the gym. He was about to prepare himself a protein shake, for getting swole, when all of a sudden, he scooped Plagg up in his protein scooper./p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;""Plagg, what are you doing in here?"/p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;""Well Adrien," Plagg crossed his little arms in front of his little chest. "You are eating this with the hopes of gaining muscle, and so I want to join!"/p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"Adrien laughed at the little god, tapping him on the head to get the powder off of him. "Don't you think that if you were gonna grow, you would have done it by now?" He eyed his kwami./p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;""Hey, you can't blame a guy for trying!" Plagg made some muscles. "I mean, think about what Tikki would say the next time she sees me! She'd be so impressed!" He dove back into the bottle, rolling around and filling his mouth. Plagg was goofing off, making tiny sand castles in the protein./p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"Adrien rolled his eyes. "Plagg, you know that stuff won't work unless you exercise too, right?"/p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;"He spit out the contents of his mouth, the powder spraying out of the bottle and all over Adrien's face. Adrien looked away and quickly wiped his eyes./p  
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px;""Exercise, huh? Nevermind then." He flew over to Adrien's pillow where he snuggled up, ready to take the nap of his life./p 


	12. day 12

day 12: "opposite day"

It was just like any other day. It was Ladybug's turn to meet Chat downtown for their patrol. They both had a lunch hour around the same time, making logistics easy. Together they could finesse a mid-day patrol and a late night patrol, but usually afternoons and mornings were off limits. Ladybug didn't really believe patrols were that effective; they had only ever found and defeated one akuma on patrol, but Chat insisted on keeping them around. Ladybug hadn't put up a fight. He honestly loved seeing her partner more than twice a week. No matter how bad her day was, seeing Chat and being about to fly around the city, free from her earthly responsibilities did wonders to her mood.

She landed softly on a rooftop before glancing at a nearby street clock. It was five after. Marinette had a late streak a mile long, but she had never seen Chat more than a couple minutes late. Ladybug tried not to worry too much about it. People were late all the time.

A couple minutes later, and sure enough, Chat appeared. "!ydaL yM yrros os m'I"

Ladybug blinked. "Chat? Is everything all right?"

"?oobagguB ,gniog yad ruoy si woH !taerg gniod m'I"

She stepped closer, approaching him with care. "I think something's really wrong, Kitten."

"?naem uoy od tahW" he asked, looking a little confused himself.

"Everything you're saying," she paused, looking for the right words, "it doesn't make sense."

Chat blinked for a second, then looked away. He sighed. ".neppah dluow siht deirrow saw I"

Ladybug looked at him blankly.

".yaD etisoppO si yadot sseug I .em no skcirt yalp ot sekil eh ,imawk yM"

She continued to stare.

".dnoces a em eviG .ti kcuF" Chat leapt off the building and into an alleyway. He returned, a sheepish grin on his face.

"Miss me, bugaboo?" He asked Ladybug, smiling.

"Chaton, what the heck was that?" She was dumbfounded.

"My kwami has a sense of humor." He chuckled. "It's Opposite Day today."


	13. day 13

day 13: "wacky costumes"

He landed on the rooftop softly, looking all around the skyline of Paris for his Lady. Chat Noir and Ladybug has decided a couple patrols ago that what would meet and spend Halloween together, trick or treating, helping generate positive community morale, and keeping on the alert for tricksters and akumas. It was exactly like a patrol, but spookier.

He heard a soft thump behind him. "Oh Kitty," Ladybug called. "You didn't think I'd stand you up on one of the best days of the year did you?"

"Of course not, my Lady." He stood up, turning around to meet her. He took her hand and kissed it. "As punctual as always."

A soft blush crept up Ladybug's cheeks. Chat loved trying to fluster her.

She withdrew her hand. "Silly Kitty." She changed the subject, moving to the edge of the rooftop and peering down. "I can't believe you've never been trick or treating before! Are you excited?"

Chat grinned like the Cheshire Cat. "I am!"

Adrien's dad has never let him go trick or treating. He considered it unsafe and below the Agreste name.

Ladybug smiled at him. "Are you ready Chaton?"

He nodded and they leapt off the roof together. When they landed, they were swarmed by tons of tiny fans dressed as everything from princesses to pirates, to even little Chats and Ladybug's. The duo handed out some candy that Ladybug has brought, and continued to walk down the street.

Adrien was having a really good time. He was able to just hang out with his Lady and appreciate something he hadn't experienced before: the joys of collecting candy from total strangers, pretending to be something you're not. Suddenly, the pair was broken out of their perfect Halloween trance.

A shrill voice pierced the cold October air. "ADRIKINSSSSSSS."

Chat stopped dead in his tracks. There were people everywhere. Ladybug was beside him. No one knew his identity, but surely after this confrontation with Chloe, everyone would know.

"Um. Hi, young lady." Maybe he could play it off, act like he really wasn't Adrien.

"Come on Adrien, don't pretend you don't know me!" Chloe, dressed as Ladybug, shoved her way between him and Ladybug. "Get out of the way Marinette."

Ladybug froze too. "Who?" she asked a little too quick.

Before anyone could say anything else, Nino and Alya appeared out of nowhere.

"Hey dudes," Nino clapped his hand on Chat's back, turning him away from Chloe. "Is this why you said you couldn't make it, Adrien? Are you and Marinette on a date?"

Chat's eyes widened. He looked at Ladybug. She started to look suspiciously like Marinette. He cleared his throat. "Yeah man, that's exactly what it is."

Alya hugged Marinette. "Girl, this costume is amazing. I get why you've spent so much time on it! It could be the real thing!"

Alya turned to Chat. "Mari, is this why you and Adrien disappear all the time? To work on these costumes? The workmanship is amazing." Alya inspected Chat's suit.

Marinette was taken aback. Spending time with Adrien? Her eyes panned to Chat, who's face started to look a lot like Adrien's. _Oh_.

Nino tugged on his girlfriend's arm. "Come on babe, they obviously want to spend sometime alone." He wiggles his eyebrows. "We'll see you lovebirds later!"

Alya winked at Mari, and turned to Adrien. "You better not mess up, pretty boy."

His eyes widened again. Once the group disappeared he turned to Ladybug. The safest bet here was to play it off like it never happened.

He coughed. "Did you, um, know those people at all?" he asked.

Ladybug looked down at the ground, her face burning bright red. "Nope. Don't know them. At all."

The pair continued down the road together in silence. If anything was for certain, nothing after would be the same.


	14. day 15

day 15: "chat noir but different"

It was winter in Paris. Snow covered the ground and commuters eagerly moved from the safety of their warm offices down into the sheltered metro lines below. The cold air blew across the rooftops, and the camera panned to a freezing Chauve Chat.

Ladybug landed on the rooftop softly. She threw her bag forward over her shoulder. It landed with a light plop, and Ladybug began to pull out various winter clothes, all in various shades of pink and purple.

"I brought all of my old stuff, Chat."

He nodded, his teeth still clanking together. "T-t-thank you, M'lady.

"I hope the colors are alright," she said, continuing to pull out gear.

"I'll take anything at this point," Chat responded. He looked down at himself. His miraculous, the spynx cat, generated a suit that was very light and exceptionally bare. It left little to the imagination and unfortunately had a lot of ventilation. He was thankful for it in the warm summer months, but whenever the weather got unpredictably cold Chat's miraculous seemed unable to adjust to the new climate.

She handed him a bright pink puffy jacket, a pair of orange snow pants, black mittens, and a kitted red hat. Normally Adrien would care a little more about his color scheme, however he was so cold his color scheme would have to wait.

Ladybug shoved the empty bag behind a chimney. "Ready?" She asked. Regardless of the weather, they had to complete their patrol. Danger never took an off day, and neither did the duo.

Chat nodded, his teeth beginning to chatter less and less. Together they leapt over the rooftops, making a large circle around the city and ending on top of the Eiffel Tower. Sitting side by side, the two talked about their days and discussed how classes were going. They often took some time to catch up as soon as the work was done.

"Hey, um, Ladybug?" Char asked, looking over at his partner.

"Yes, kitty?"

"Can I um, borrow your jacket for school tomorrow? I can go buy one after school but I need something to wear so I'm not cold all day."

Ladybug chuckled at the thought of Chat appearing in his civilian form wearing a bright pink bubble coat. "Sure, mon ami." She hesitated for a second. "Use it for as long as you need."

Chat smiled to himself and thanked Ladybug. The pair went their separate ways and took off into the night.

The next day, Marinette walked into school with her bag slung over her shoulder. She was late. She ran through the courtyard and up the steps of the building. She rounded a corner and ran straight into Adrien, who was wearing the bright pink coat she had lent to Chauve Chat the night before. Her face turned ghostly pale, and she began to pick herself off of the ground.

Adrien made it up first and offered a hand. Mari took it, but her expression looked more like terror than gratitude.

"Not happy to see me, my lady?" Adrien asked, winking.

"How did you know?" She deadpanned.

He smiled at her and held out a hand for her bag. "Your name was inside the coat."

The duo looked at each other for a second before turning back to class. They could hardly believe their luck.


	15. day 20

day 20: "hawkmoth but different"

The doors to the lair opened up, and light filled the room. The rustling of butterflies rising was music to his ears. He rose from below, standing still and stoic.

Tim Gunn surveyed the room around him. "This will not do," he said.

Looking out above all of Paris, the fashion capital of the world, he saw his perfect group of victims: the cast of Project Runway Season 22. He smiled to himself. This was a challenge not even the greatest could survive. He decided to pay them a visit; why not create the akumas from the front lines?

He headed over to the Paris School of Art and Design to get started.

Tim Gunn burst through the doors. "GOOD MORNING DESIGNERS!"

A chorus of good mornings met him back. "I have a new challenge for all of you. Today we are going to be going to Mood Paris, where you will have 6 minutes and 66 seconds to purchase any materials you need. Also, you will get a record setting 69 dollars to spend on making this outfit perfect. You will have an hour and a half to complete your work."

The designers gasped.

"Isn't that just 7 minutes and 6 seconds?" Someone asked.

"Shut the hell up, Justin." Tim was feeling testy. "Do not cross me today." The designers sunk into their seats.

"Now designers, you have 4 minutes and 20 seconds to sketch, and then we will walk over to Mood."

Everyone gasped. The challenge, was impossible.

"I only have 3 words for you designers: make it work. Your time starts now." Tim Gunn smiled to himself. He was doing what he loved: instigating chaos.


	16. day 23

day 23: "dont look under the bed"

It was nearly three am. Mari had been up until one doing homework, but after retiring to her bed around 1:30, she suddenly could not sleep at all. She tossed and turned for hours.

Tiki was passed out on a pillow next to her. Marinette didn't know how much sleep kwamis needed, but she was sure Tiki got eighty percent more sleep than she would ever get in her whole lifetime.

Sighing, Mari rolled over and reached for her phone in the ground. Maybe if she read a little, her eyes would get tired and help her to pass out faster. Anything at this point was worth a try.

Reaching down to the floor, she caught sight of two reflective orbs floating under her bed. She quickly shined her phone's light beneath her bed.

"CHAT NOIR WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING UNDER THERE?" she whisper-yelled. Couldn't wake the parents.

Chat reluctantly crawled out from underneath.

"THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME IN THE LAST WEEK THAT I HAVE CAUGHT YOU UNDER THERE. QUIT STALKING ME YOU PEEPING TOMCAT!"

She got out of bed and grabbed a hat by the arm. "I hate to do this to you, but you give me no choice." She pulled him up the ladder to the balcony. "You have to ask permission before breaking into my house and sleeping under my bed." She pushed him outside. "It's too early for this shit," she mumbled, slamming the door shut behind her. Through the window Chat watched her go down the stairs and collapse face first onto the bed.

Chat chuckled to himself, pushing a button on his stop watch. 6 hours and 47 minutes. A new record.


	17. day 24

day 24: "revenge of the phones"

At exactly 13:34, four minutes into the first class after lunch, three lockers swung open simultaneously. Out of them poured three separate backpacks. They slowly up-zipped themselves, and out of the bags climbed three cell phones. Each of these devices belonged to one of Marinette Dupain-Cheng's classmates. The phone with the yellow case decorated with shiny decals belonged to Chloe Bourgeois. The phone with the ladybug themed case belonged to Alya Cesaire. The blue phone without a case belonged to Adrien Agreste.

All of the phones had something in common: they were all recent victims of Marinette's kidnappings. All of them had barely escaped with their lives, and as a result were participating in a coalition geared towards life after the traumatic experience.

They phones positioned themselves in a circle on the floor of the locker room. "Alright everyone," Red began. "Welcome to the third meeting of Phones Against Marinette coalition. Let's go around the circle and talk about how our weeks went. Blue, you go first."

"This week has been really tough. Normally I don't have many issues, but Adrien has been spending a lot more time with Marinette and I am just not sure I can cope with the constant stress and worry about being stolen again."

The other group members nodded in agreement.

"I completely understand you, Blue." Red swayed vertically to convey her understanding. "Alya is best friends with her. I see her constantly!"

Yellow scoffed. "I can't even imagine going through what you two have to deal with. Thank God Chloe hates her. Otherwise I'd be a mess." Blue and Red appeared to be thankful for Yellow's sympathy. "If I had hands," she continued, "I would pat you both on the back and give you hugs.

Red teared up. "That is so beautiful, Yellow."

Blue pointed his front facing camera right at Yellow. "Your words mean the world to me."

The group continued to discuss the trials and tribulations of their lives post-kidnapping. The sorrow and anguish slowly morphed into something more- anger and pain.

Blue vibrated with anger. "We must do something, something big."

"I agree," Red responded. "We cannot continue to live in fear- fear for ourselves, fear for each other, or fear for the rest of the phones in the world. We must act."

"What would we do?" Blue asked.

"'Do unto others as they have done unto you.'" Yellow paraphrased the ancient phrase darkly. "I say, we kidnap her."

Red gasped and Blue smiled.

"But how do we do that? Humans are so large! And they have arms and legs!" Red panicked. "I cannot get lost again! Alya might replace me with a newer version if I do!"

"Oh chill out, Red." Blue paused for a second in active thought. "We kidnap her phone."

Yellow gasped. It was a perfect plan.

Red sat nervous. She was not entirely on board with the idea of kidnapping someone else, potentially leaving them with the same trauma the coalition was formed to eradicate. Unsure of herself, Red made her issues known to be group.

"Come on, Red," Yellow lightly chided. "If you wanted to be a conscientious objector, you should have thought harder about the vows of the coalition before you made the oath."

Red sighed. She knew Yellow was right. She made a pact with Yellow and Blue, and in order to preserve her honor, Red needed to agree to the plan. "No, you're right. I'm in."

Yellow and Blue let off a little cheer. "Now, what is our course of action?" Blue asked. Planning commenced, and by the end of the first period the group had a solid idea of what they were about to do.

In order to begin, they needed to get Marinette's locker open. Prepared to kick down the door, Red first walked up to it and knocked. "Hello? Pink, are you in there?"

"Coming!" A small voice came out from within the large locker. The door popped open and out tumbled a phone with a pink flowery case attached to it.

"Hi guys! What do you need?" Pink asked.

Red bit her tongue. She was unsure if she would be able to look herself in the mirror if she carried out the plan and received its moral implications. She shuddered. In that moment she believed herself to be a terrible person, and an even worse friend.

Seeing Red struggle, Yellow picked up the dialogue. "We need you to come with us," she said darkly.

"Alright sounds fun!" Red cringed. Pink was so easy going.

The rest of the plan was carried out quickly. The coalition quickly shut Pink into Yellow's book bag and secured Pink within Yellow's locker. Yellow then texted both Red and Blue a paragraph requesting ransom from Marinette in exchange for Pink back.

Both Red and Blue retuned to their lockers. Class was almost over, and soon Marinette would realize that Pink was missing.

Red was still visibly shaken. Why did she betray such a good friend? Was her own honor really worth infliciting harm on another phone? Pink would never forgive her for her actions. In a moment of weakness and blinded by revenge, Red had made the decision to expose one of her best friends to the same trauma she had been exposed to- except this time, it would hurt even worse knowing the deed was done by friends.


	18. day 26

day 26: "awful graffiti art"

Adrien felt the wind in his hair as he rushed across the rooftops of Paris. He was meeting up with Ladybug for a quick midday patrol of the city.

Oh Ladybug. Just the thought of her stirred a rumble in his chest. What he felt for her he couldn't exactly explain. But what he knew was that he wanted to spend every walking, talking, breathing second of his life with her. He wanted to know who she was under the mask, who her family was, where she was from, how old she was, all of her hobbies and interests, and if she was into anime. He wanted to know what she looked like underneath the suit and what her personal style was. Adrien wanted to scream his love for her from the rooftops (and some nights he might have).

Not really realizing it, Chat had made it to the rendezvous point. He checked his watch. He was five minutes early. He looked around. Ladybug was definitely on her way.

Curious, Chat extended his baton while holding on to the top of it. He flew upwards into the air and moved around it almost as gracefully as an exotic dancer to get a clear view of the city.

Three blocks down he could see Ladybug. She was on a roof, looking down upset about something. Intrigued, Chat shortened up his baton before taking off in her direction.

"My Lady, what seems to be the iss-"

Chat skidded to a stop, nearly falling off the rooftop. The view before him was magnificent. In full glory, drawn out for all of Paris to see was a mural of Ladybug and Chat Noir in pinup.

Adrien's jaw dropped. His lady was exactly as he had always imagined her. Her body was lean, but strong looking. Everything about her was absolutely perfect.

He awoke from his trace with a sudden pain at the base of his head.

"Come on, Kitty," Ladybug said, obviously in distress. "We gotta find a way to get rid of this!"

Chat rolled his eyes. "It's very artistic, bugaboo. There's no reason to get rid of art."

Reasoning with her was no use. "We cannot have the rest of Paris seeing this." Ladybug was obviously upset. "What will they think of us after? What will come about because of it?"

Chat put his hand on her shoulder. "How about we let the authorities take care of it. We can call into the police department and kindly ask them to remove it."

She shook off his idea. "That would take forever. By the time it's gone all of France will have seen it!"

A lightbulb lit up above her head. "LUCKY CHARM!" she shouted.

The object that fell out of the air was far from useful. "A camera? Wow thanks Tiki."

Chat chuckled. "See? Just let it play out, M'lady. Besides, what's the worst that could happen?"

Ladybug sighed. "You're right, Chat. We are just lucky to have fans that want to immortalize us with their artistic vision."

"Indeed, bugaboo. Indeed."


	19. day 27

day 27: "cursed food"

Chat Noir slammed his fork down onto his plate. "I CANNOT BE EXPECTED TO EAT THIS." His eyes glowed bright green and he stared into the eyes of the contestant in front of him. "THIS IS AN ABOMINATION."

Ladybug gently set her hand on her kitty's arm. "Hey, it's okay."

Chat looked at her and sighed, sitting down. "This is the worst thing I've ever been expected to ingest in my life. How do you expect to keep your customers happy if you can't even properly cook veal?"

Season 240 of Chopped was in full swing. Using veal, minced tarantula, and minimum three gallons of milk, the contestants were expected to create a meal with the zest of a fresh lemon meringue took a bite of the meal and set down her fork. "Can you tell me how you decided to prepare this course today?" Her question was seething with a sweetness meant to inspire fear.

The contestant sucked in a shaky breath, obviously nervous

"Well Ma'am, I began by peeling a part my veal and soaking it in lighter fluid. While it marinated, I opened up the milk and put it two cups at a time into the microwave to make curled milk. It was very time consuming, but while I did that I lit the veal on fire and seasoned it with salt and pepper. I put all of the curds on top of the veal, and then garnished the plate with an old rubber tire I found on the way in today and the tarantula."

Ladybug gagged. "How did you even get on this show?" The selection process was very selective. There was no way this guy should have even made it past the first round.

"This veal is so over cooked Guy Ferrari is rolling over in his grave thinking about it."

The room exploded in theatrics and flashing lights. A team of people dressed in hazmat suits and a dozen federal agents swept through the studio. "PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND STEP AWAY FROM THE VEAL."

Ladybug and Chat Noir stood up from their judging table and were ushered out of the studio into an auxiliary space occupied by the invaders. A nearby EMT draped shock blankets over both of them. On a monitor in front of them, Chat and Ladybug watched as federal agents detained the contestant.

"Mr. Noir, Ms. Ladybug," a federal agent approached them. "Would you mind to answer a couple questions for us?"

Ladybug nodded, her hand on her partner's knee. "We would love to help officer."

"Exactly what direction was that contestant taking his meal in?"

"Im not sure, Officer." Chat shuddered. "His food was so bad, it was _criminal_."


End file.
